Advice from Myspace Chain Letters Could Seriously Backfire!

This was also found on the Snopes discussion form, apparently it originally
came from Myspace. My comments run throughout.

A True Boyfriend

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IF YOU DONT REPOST THIS, YOUR HIGH SCHOOL YEARS WILL BE THE WORST YEARS OF
YOUR LIFE!

-Well, I'm out of highschool, and the worst years of my life came later, thanks to real life events which chain mail had no part
of.

AND your next boyfriend/girlfriend will hate you.

-Gaursh, that's some powerful chain email, what is it going to do, bore into
the head and invade the mind of some future wanna-be bf of mine and
completely program him to hate me if I don't pass it on? I've heard some
stupid claims in chain mail, but this one really is laughable! ROTFLOL This
is going to be funny!

- Give her a hoodie of yours to wear so other people know she is yours.

-Ewww! Who wants to wear somebody else's clothes!? Besides, I belong to me
and no one else, so any guy hoping to have any remote chance at a
relationship with me's gonna know that right off the bat. Sure, I'll wear
his hoodie only on two conditions, 1. it hasn't been worn by him for too
long first, and 2. if he'll wear one of my sweaters, fair's fair, after all!

- Leave her sweet texts to wake up to.

-And make me suspicious, annoyed, or both. I don't go for the sweet nothings
and don't require flattery.

- Sneak up behind her. - Grab her by the waist.

-And get screamed at plus a wallop or anything from cds to a drink thrown at
you, depending on what I might be holding at the time.

- Do anything to make her smile. - Always make her laugh.

-Good ideas, but good luck trying to figure out how... I might end up
laughing at the desperate attempts instead of the end result.

- Tell her shes beautiful, not sexy.

-And get treated with the same unimpressed reaction as if you had said
"sexy"

- Tell her she has amazing eyes.

-And have them rolled at you.

- When your friends walk by, say, "This is my girlfriend."

-And get blushed at and told to stop repeating yourself if I am your
girlfriend, or get shoved and told to get the heck away from me if you're
not!

- Say I love you to her face not JUST over the phone.

-That works, but don't make a habit of it.

- If she's sad, take her in your arms and tell her everything will be okay.

-Better still, just don't say anything since what I might be sad about, you
may not know if it will be okay or not. If for sure not, don't humor me with
empty reassurances unless you want to get blown up at. Just holding's fine.

- NEVER cheat on her.

-Right! Cheat on me, and that's it bud, you're so outa my life with no
chance of ever getting back in it again...Zip...Ziltch...Nada!

- Kiss her on the forehead.

-I prefer a kiss on the cheek, and that's only if he's actually managed to
get into my affections.

- When you walk with her, walk slowly.

-No, walk the way you normally walk, and don't slow me down if I'm in a
hurry to get somewhere.

- Tickle her, even when she says stop.

-No, no, no! Stop means stop, and if you don't listen when I tell you to
stop, we're done.

- Don't say I love you unless you mean it.

-Exactly.

- Listen to her when she talks.

-And don't expect me to talk all the time.

- Tell her your secrets.

-And expect any range of reactions depending on what they are.

- Protect her.

-From what? *Rolling eyes* I'm not a damsel in distress, hopefully I
wouldn't need protection from you, but if you follow all this advice, well,
can we say stalker? Ewww!

- Brush any hair out of her face and say something chessy like: "Sorry, I
just want to see your beautiful face." and add a cheesy smile :P Girls love
it xP

-Not this girl! 1. I can't stand people obsessed with "owning" a g/bf as a
piece of eye-candy and if you're attraction to me is only skin-deep, you can
make like diarrhea and move on. 2. My hair's too short to get in my face let
alone flick out of it, so you should get a good look at my face every time
you look at me, so there. 3. Just what do you think you're doing messing
with my hair. Did I not brush it well enough or something? Huh? Huh? Well?

Girls repost as - A True Boyfriend
Guys repost as - I would do this for my girl any day In the next 30 seconds
and something great will happen to you today. If you don't you will lose
someone very important to

-Yeah, right, and lava is really made up of ice... The only thing I've lost
so far is my composure! Roflol!